The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize