if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
this just has baby written all over it
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
