At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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