Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Randomize
