Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
