Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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