you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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