Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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