I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
