I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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