This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
