Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
