somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
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