also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Randomize
