69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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