I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
