I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
