Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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