D3 body, D1 cock
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
