I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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