I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
