Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize