I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
