wake up i wanna do it froggy style
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
