the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
