If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
