ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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