is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize