The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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