Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
