Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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