i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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