Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
