well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
