I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
