I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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