is your mom at the bar?
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I love you. Go after that dick
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
