My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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