Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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