so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
