You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
