wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Randomize
