I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
