I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
