Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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