Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
