pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
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