I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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