Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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