it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
