We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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