We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
