So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
The struggles of a small town man whore
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
